I Have No Life

My friends worry. I am a TV junkie and the remote is my needle. And I'm not talkin' Masterpiece Theater...

When I mention Jo Frost, Goil, Gordon Ramsay and Sanjaya, they shake their heads and walk away. Most of them have boyfriends or bowling leagues or ceramics class to keep them busy at night. Me? I pull my pint of Ben & Jerry's close in anticipation and surf.

I tell myself I can kick the habit but when 8pm comes, I become Billie Holiday hooked on VH1. I pride myself that I have never sunk to "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" or those Danny Bonaduce/Andrew Dice Clay abberrations, but you will find my telephone turned off for "Work Out" and "Hell's Kitchen." There's something about being berated by a man in a uniform (even a chef's) that rings my bell. Now that "HK" is off, I get my fix watching Chef Ramsay on "The F Word."


In an effort to raise my culture-level at bedtime, I was given a copy of "War and Piece" by my friend Laurel. It makes a nice coaster for my Diet Coke and Cherry Garcia...